Fire and Ice

Westword was going to challenge our partner paper, Phoenix New Times, to a bet on the outcome of the Rockies/Diamondback series — but we couldn't think of anything we wanted from Phoenix.

A downtown that's a ghost town at night, instead of the party that LoDo has become almost every night of the week — and not just when crazed baseball fans are high-fiving with brooms?

Prime Colorado weed for Arizona meth?

John Denver's greatest hits for those of Alice Cooper, whose Cooperstown was a bust in Denver?

Twenty inches of snow — and a mayor who keeps his cool and calls for sledding and hot chocolate — for 120-degree summer days and a mayor who gets hot under the collar?

Crackpot congressman Tom Tancredo for crackpot sheriff Joe Arpaio?

Colorado green chile for prickly-pear jelly?

Finally, we decided on this: Losing state gives up water rights, and ownership reverts back to Mexico.

Play ball.