At the start of the summer, in anticipation of all those hot times ahead, we shared a string of articles about dating in Denver, including a cover piece that explored "Why Dating in Denver Is a Dumpster Fire." We also hosted an essay contest asking readers to share their best bad-date story.
Now, because misery loves company, we've introduced "Dateless in Denver," a series of reader essays on the realities of dating in Denver — the good, the bad and the ugly — that kicked off with Jess's story of a date who sharted on her lawn, and followed with R.M.'s tale of a bad first date on First Friday and Mer's tale of a bacon-loving boy. Now keep reading for Mia's date:
Our date was at Monkey Barrel because my date told me they had a really great $9 burger and beer special. Anyway, I am a prompt person, so I got there with five minutes to spare because you never know what the parking situation will be. He had texted me a few minutes before, letting me know he was already at the bar.
Once I got there, he had already ordered his beer, no biggie. However, I didn't realize this meant he had also ordered his burger. Once I sat down to order, his burger was already on its way out, and he began to eat while I was sitting there and chatting. I ordered my burger, and the bartender asked if I wanted to start a tab. I paused for a moment to see if my date would spare the $9 for my burger and beer, but alas, he stayed silent.
The rest of the date included him watching the TV behind me while we were talking, oversharing way too much about his previous relationships, and asking very few questions about me.
After one hour (down to the minute), we got our bills, mine a whopping $9, and he proceeded to invite me to ice cream, which I politely declined because anyone in that bar could confirm that the date was not going well.
Bad date, yes. Great burger? I would recommend the burger but not the guy.
Have a dating story — good or bad — that you'd like to share? We'll be running another installment of "Dateless in Denver" next weekend. Send your submission to [email protected].